Hello Anniegirl76!
Welcome aboard!
You have come to the right place to receive all kinds of understanding and help.
There are hundreds of people here who have already gone through, or are going through now, exactly the same things as you.
It's an amazing community of helpful people who share the common bond of at one time being trapped in the WT cult. There are former district and circuit overseers, bethelites, missionaries, pioneers, elders, ministerial servants, publisher, studies, spouses of JWs etc etc - all with diverse backgrounds who are here for you. Many are still in NOW and are trying to figure out the best way to leave.
We are very glad to have you here.
Don't stop asking questions and you will eventually be completely free.
peace to you!
The Oracle